I was on the fence, but now...

Ya, so...I'm at home right now, which is currently located in a dark basement, right? And Mike is working with the BYU Men's soccer team in Ogden and won't get back until midnight. It's rainy outside, dark and it's thundering. Usually this weather calms me, makes me feel all snuggly and stuff but not tonight.

Tonight I am...gulp...frightened! (Thunder claps in the background as my dark room eerily lights and fades with a florescent bolt of lightening and then...WHAT THE...! Oh, my phone seriously just made a noise indicating I have a new text message. PHEW, but definitely the wrong time for my friend to tell me she is currently partying at a Scottish festival. However, now that the initial shock has worn off, I better tell her to watch out for those kilts, it's a windy night)

Anyway...

WHY, you ask, am I so frightened? Well, I'll tell you why in one word: CLOWNS

I mean, isn't it obvious? Okay, maybe not so obvious to some so I'll explain. After I got Andrew in bed for the night, I made myself dinner and decided to see what was on the ol' boob tube. Just my luck, the first thing I come to is, The Dark Knight.

"My," I thought to myself, "I haven't seen this show. Mike saw it, said it was alright. Why not?" (For the record, I am astounded by my own stupidity at times...I mean, there was a REASON I didn't go see it with Mike the first time and now I suddenly think I'd be OK because--what--I'm sitting at home, alone, in a nearly windowless basement next to a storage room which, quit frankly, smells a little freakish?)

Well, it had just started so I began watching... and watching. I could have just turned it off, sure, but no! Instead, Einstein Emily, watched as it began with a sickly scene of joker making people rob a bank and then killing each other, or something, and then basically the same thing happened over and over again. And, let's be honest, no matter how cute that Christian Bale may be, it did nothing...NOTHING to make me see any light in that warped piece of cinema. However, the thing that made it worse was not all the dark undertones (actually, more like OVERtones) it was the freakishly disheveled, grotesque clown that Heath Ledger became as the Joker. (Ya, the guy definitely deserves the Oscar, May he rest in peace.)

Now, bear in mind, I don't wish to offend anyone because I know many a man (lot less women, though) LOVE this movie and to you I say, alright...more power to ya. But it's just not my thing. And it was the indescribably freakish joker that has now put me into a fit full of the heebie-jeebies!

So this is what it comes down to.

I have always been on the fence with clowns. Yes, I see how they are scary. I mean, an ADULT human being dressed up in stupid, over-size clothing with an obscene amount of face paint meant to "accentuate" their expressions. Not to mention, they have abnormally large feet and prefer the "Hyuk, hyuck" laughter. That's really not normal...even if it is meant to entertain small children, actually...ESPECIALLY if it's meant to entertain small children. BUT on the other side, I also saw how they can be fun. I grew up watching Bozo the happy clown who gave away prizes on his Saturday morning show to children and not to mention, Ronald McDonald? The guy was full of fun, and I think he was even on Sesame Street! So basically, it was these nice portrayals of this very un-natural phenomenon that have always made me stay on the fence when asked how I felt about our "friendly" circus pals.

But now...after seeing The Dark Knight I find myself way off the fence on this one. I mean, I have completely cleared the fence and sprinted half-way across the lawn to the door, but somehow can't quite make it to safety because a lunatic man equipped with a squeaky red nose and rainbow colored hair is trying to grab my ankle.

Also because of this movie every scary depiction of a clown I have ever seen has come racing back into my head. Like the one time my sister and I stayed home on a Halloween night and watched a part of that movie, IT (edited on TV). Or the one time, again, on a Halloween when that weird kid I sat next to in English came to class dressed like a clown and then ASKED ME OUT! I mean, scary memories...so what do I do now?

Ughhh...I'm all freaked out. Maybe you could do me a solid and leave a comment with some nice thoughts or happy memories?!?

THANKS!